What a week

Just to let you know I am still around - it has been tough but we are getting there. Al is doing as well as can be expected - he was really quite chirpy this morning but when I got to see him after work, he wasn't as up-beat. He did get up and I think that he couldn't settle his leg after that so has had to up the pain relief. I think it is going to be pretty much like this for the next 6 weeks while he gets used to trying to walk with the frame in his leg (which is really quite heavy - certainly a lot heavier than we were expecting it to be) as well as having to deal with the adjustments to the frame when they start to happen next week.

I am totally exhausted after 3 nights of not much sleep, the travelling between Brisbane and here, the waiting around which happened yesterday, the dashing around at work catching up today and just the whole emotional strain that I find myself under. Food has been the least of my priorities - didn't manage to have dinner last night or tonight - maybe I will be able to time it better tomorrow night.

Kathryn - there is a quick drying top coat called Insta-Dri by Sally Hansen - it is an anti-chip top coat and is fantastic for stopping any smudges on your nail polish. I normally wait about 5-10 mins after I have put a second coat of nail polish on and then paint a coat of this on - wait about 10-15 mins and I never have any smudges. You can normally pick this up at Priceless / Big W / KMart / Target - they are generally cheaper than a chemist unless the chemist is having a special.

Take care everyone and have a great week !

What a day !!!

I am not even going to try to explain about the day I have had today
because it just doesn't bear worth repeating. Suffice to say that 4
Anzac biscuits on top of my normal food didn't help my cause.

It has been a hectic few days with lots of things going on. Nothing
worth mentioning here as it is just the usual family and work stuff.

The exciting news is that we ordered a new computer last night –
hopefully it will be here within a couple of weeks. Having said that,
our PC has been behaving itself since it was revived on Sunday night –
the problem is that I don't have that much confidence that it isn't
going to fall in a heap in the future.

Another good thing is that we have managed to get rid of our old
pavers – YAY !!!!!! The ones which I have already pulled up will be
collected on Saturday and then as soon as the others are done, they
will be collected as well. So no trips to the dump to get rid of them
!!!!!! WOOHOOOOOO !!!

The last few days have been so so. I did go for a walk on Monday
night even though all I wanted to do was curl up on my bed and sleep.
I felt much better for having gone. Last night I didn't walk as my
folks came over for a good-bye dinner. I will miss them dreadfully
while they are away but I am sure that they will have a great time
with their family and friends whom they haven't seen for about 20
months.

The scales are continuing to show a downward move which is good. I am
trying really hard most of the time but I have to confess to a few
slips along the way. The good thing is that they are only small slips
and haven't turned into big binges which is what would have happened a
few weeks ago. Even today, I have put the brakes on after the
biscuits and I will compensate by not eating the snacks I brought with
me to work. A visit to the chiro was on the cards for this evening
but after a run around this morning I thought I would cancel it.
Since getting to work I have had a splitting headache and so decided
to go to the chiro appointment and get it sorted out rather than put
it off and find that it gets worse and will take longer to fix up
especially as I won't have much time for chiro appointments in the
next couple of weeks.

I have a hair trim booked for tomorrow night – I am sure that will
also help to make me feel better. My hair is starting to really annoy
me and if I don't do something about it soon, I am going to land up
cutting it really short again and I don't want to do that if I can
help it.

I have started reading a book which I bought for Al a while ago called
"Don't Sweat the Small Stuff – remember, It's All Small Stuff" – what
a great book. I will share some of it with you as I go along - there
are so many great little tips in it. While I think that there are
things which are just not practical for my life style / job – there
are other things which are really good. I have been battling with
some aspects of my job (as you do in a new job) and getting quite
stressed out about it but when I was reading this morning (1am) I
realised that he was right – it really is a lot of small stuff and not
worth getting my knickers in a knot over. Now I know that I won't
have this attitude all the time (because no doubt there will still be
things that stress me out that I can't just say – it's only small
stuff and I am not going to sweat it) but the more I do it, the more
it becomes a habit (just like opening the fridge and taking that
chocolate bar out and breaking a piece off and eating it before I have
even realised I am doing it) and the easier it will be to do.
Practising random acts of kindness is another one – not for any sort
of pay back but just because it will make someone else's day more
pleasant. I suppose if I can work on one or two of the techniques he
talks about at once, I will slowly be able to change my perceptions
and reactions in different situations. It is certainly worth a try
anyway.

Thanks to the people who have replied saying that they had bras to
send me – all donations will be gratefully received and passed on.

Take care everyone and have a great Wednesday !!!!

TFTD : Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to
another, "What ! You too ? Thought I was the only one."

TIAGF : My blogging friends who have made me realise that I am not the
only one battling these demons

The best laid plans ....

Oh no – that probably isn't the right cliché to start with as that
would mean that I actually had a plan !!! Work wise I had lots of
plans for the weekend – unfortunately my planning skills did not
extend to my food for the weekend which is a pity because it is always
sad when you manage to keep it together during the week only to blow
it on the weekend. The good thing is that I am still showing a loss
for the week of 0.6 – not earth shattering but a downward move which
is at least going the right way.

Friday night dinner went off very well – I finally realised why the
dessert I have made so many times hasn't worked the last couple of
times – it helps if you read the correct quantities before adding the
ingredients. With the marinades on the chicken, the cheese sauce and
hot apple dessert and custard I probably didn't do as well as I could
have on that meal.

Saturday morning saw us up bright and early watching the USA baseball
playoffs when I remembered that the Mudgeeraba markets were on. They
have some good veggies on sale but even better are the donuts that
they sell. I am not a donut person but the donuts there are just
fantastic. I was in two minds about whether to go or not and in the
end decided that we needed some more veggies and so we went. Well we
got there too late to get much in the way of decent veggies and the
donuts were just about all sold out but there were still a few left –
K had a chocolate one, I had a custard one and Al had an apple danish
and then we shared a twisted donut between us. They were just
delicious. If you like donuts and you ever get the chance to go to
these markets – do yourself a favour – DON'T BUY THE DONUTS !!!!!!

This is not the best way to start your day from a food point of view
and it really set me up to have a shocking day. After some other
errands we stopped and got some turkish bread which we had for lunch
with cheese, tomato, lettuce and mayo. After dropping K at work it
was back into the garden and the moving of another +-380 pavers – am I
ever going to get to the end of these damn pavers. I think there are
another 900 – 1000 which have to be moved before they are finally all
out of the way but that will only happen the week before the concreter
arrives. We went off to work with no dinner as we had run out of time
but when we got home I got stuck into the biscuits and then had some
left over dessert before going to bed.

Sunday morning saw us back in the garden this time digging trenches
for the additional drainage points that we now need according to the
guy who will be coming in to do the concreting. So lots of digging
and moving of current drainage pipes plus some weeding and moving of
pavers (about 60) saw me feeling about 100 years old last night.

On top of all of this the computer at home died completely. I was
getting just a little hysterical because all our photos are on there,
e-mal addresses, tax returns, letters to drs etc. Al was on the phone
a couple of times to a friend of ours who is a computer whiz and last
night after collecting K from work we picked up some pizzas (no lunch
eaten yesterday while working in the garden) and went around to their
house last night. Thank goodness he managed to get it re-started.
After sitting with the two computers next to each other he Googled the
messages that were coming up on our machine on his machine and they
managed to work their way through whatever the issues were and get it
up and running again. We got home and Al did whatever it was that was
recommended and then before going to bed he saved all our photos onto
a removable hard drive so at least those are safe for now. I have
said that while he is off he can make that one of his tasks to get
finished – sort out what we need to have on the computer, what can be
deleted and save the rest to the removable hard drive so that if
anything like this happens again, I don't have to get all upset over
what we would have lost if we couldn't revive the PC.

Needless to say with all the work accomplished above, I did not do any
walking – my legs were feeling much better although they are rather
tight today along with my back and arms aching but I know that is just
from the work done yesterday. The front of my legs aren't hurting at
all today so maybe a walk will be in order tonight.

I have a favour to ask – if any of you reading this could mention the
Bras for Breast Cancer promotion and either point people to my site so
that they can contact me if they have any bras they would like to
donate or ask them to e-mail me – that way more people will be reached
and more money can be raised. Thanks.

TFTD : Man can live for about forty days without food, about three
days without water, about eight minutes with air but only for one
second without hope.

TIAGF : No rain while we have had no facia boards.

TGIF

Thank goodness it's Friday is all I can say ! Last night I went
shopping after work for the dinner we are having tonight for friends.
After we got home I unpacked the groceries and then got changed and
went for a walk.

There are times when I am pleased that I don't take my mobile when I
go walking but last night wasn't one of them. My shins were sore from
my walk the previous night and after about 5 mins I wondered what I
was doing. I kept on telling myself "Just to the next road" but of
course the problem is that as far as you walk one way, you have to
walk the same distance back again. I got to where I had turned the
night before and thought "If only I had my phone with me I would ring
Al and ask him to pick me up" – it's my own fault because he asked me
if I was talking my phone before I left and I said no because they
were both home and knew where I was going. The front of my legs were
so sore – actually they are still sore having just walked down and
back to the oval (twice) to catch some of K's softball game !!! I
couldn't make up my mind if I was doing myself more damage by walking
when they were sore or if I would actually help them to stop being
sore. Al said maybe there was some muscle fatigue because I haven't
done any exercise for a while so I will go along with that but if it
doesn't improve I will have to see what else it could be. K (with her
wealth of medical knowledge) said maybe it was shin splints ! Will
wait and see who is right.

I have had the most dreadful headache since about 10.30 last night.
Thank goodness is seems to have eased a little this afternoon as we
are having friends over for dinner tonight and I didn't want to have
to cancel seeing as my fridge is full of food. Luckily I got most of
the preparation done last night after I got home from walking so it
will just be a matter of cooking the veggies and cheese sauce and
making dessert. Al will cook the meat and chicken on the Weber and I
am sure we will have a great evening. It is ages since we have caught
up with some of these friends so there will be lots to catch up on.
It really is a shame at how busy our lives seem to be that so much
time passes between seeing friends. But, be that as it may, we will
be seeing them tonight and will be able to have a good catch up
session.

We have a busy weekend ahead of us with lots of work in the garden.
Having only 2 weekends to get at least 4 weekends worth of work done
means that we won't be doing much playing !!! Next weekend is the
Leukaemia Foundation World's Greatest Grill – how quickly has that
come around – but it will be good as it will give Al a chance to catch
up with a lot of people before he goes into hospital.

Take care everyone and I hope you have a great weekend !

TFTD : Don't wait for something big to occur. Start where you are,
with what you have, and that will always lead you into something
greater.

TIAGF : It being Friday

YAY - I did it !!!

Yes – I did it – I went walking last night. I thought that I was
going to get an early start to the evening but after school sport and
some other issues, I only got home at 5.50pm. I walked inside and
thought "I really can't be bothered going for a walk" but then a few
minutes later I remembered that I would have to come here and say "I
didn't walk last night" and I knew that I had to just get changed and
get out there. It was only for 35 minutes but I did it – I got
changed and I went walking. This is one of the reasons why blogging
works for me – it is the accountability that makes the difference. I
have to say that my shins are a little sore today but I suppose that
is to be expected when you start exercising after not doing anything
for so long.

M, I saw your comment last night re the recycling and I just cracked
up all over again !!! There were quite a few times last night at work
that I looked at my rubbish trolley (with the flattened boxes in them)
and either had a chuckle or smiled to myself – please thank M again
from me !!!!!!

I did manage to get onto the internet from home last night and saw
that the formatting on my blog isn't quite right but I'm not sure how
I can change that with posting via e-mail. If anything looks really
awful, please would you drop me a mail as I don't normally go onto my
blog to look at it.

My food today has been good except I did have a Tim Tam this morning –
maybe I should have said no thank you but I felt that if I am getting
my knickers in a knot over having one Tim Tam, life really isn't worth
much. I am trying to take the 'it is all about moderation' stance and
figure that one Tim Tam falls into that category. I was very pleased
with myself because the 1 didn't turn into 2, 3 or 4 which it could
quite easily have done (and probably would have done last week).

I have to keep reminding myself that this is going to take some time
but that I will get there in the end. I was very pleased to see a
downward movement in the scales yesterday morning – given that they
haven't moved anywhere for the past two weeks, I can now see that the
small changes I have been making must be making a difference.

Will let you know tomorrow how the rest of today went – take care,
look after yourselves and be good !

TFTD : Friendship is the wine of life

TIAGF : Things that make me laugh

Bras for Cancer

In October each year, Gold FM Radio Station (92.5) have a Bras for
Cancer appeal. Conrad Jupiter donate $1 for each bra collected to the
Breast Cancer Association.

If there is anyone who has bras they are no longer using - whether
they be too big, too small, out of shape or just no longer usable - and you are interested in donating them to this really good cause - please would you e-mail me and I will send you the address where you can send them to.

Thank you in advance for your generosity.

Another day, another dollar

Last night I did make it to pilates and I did manage to get home from
work in time to jog part of the way and walk the rest of the way to
class. Jeez – I'm so unfit. I ran up the two flights of stairs
(because it was close to starting time) and by the time I got to the
top flight I was definitely breathing a lot harder than I used to. Oh
well – at least it is a start and I can't ask more of myself than
that. I have planned a walk this evening – there are left overs from
last night for dinner so won't have to do anything for that. I just
need to get home, get changed and get out there.

We had some rain this morning but I am hoping that the house is still
OK – will find out when we get home tonight.

Other than that – there is not much in the way of news. My food
yesterday was so so – it could have been better but given the past
couple of months, it could have been heaps worse as well. As I have
my lunch and snacks with me and I have no trips to Coles planned at
lunch time, I expect that my food intake for the day will be a lot
better than yesterday !!

Work is coming along fine – probably a little slower than I would like
but I am getting there. It was lovely during the holidays – casual
dress every day. I love being able to come to work in casual dress.
The children came back on Monday and it was like everyone had had red
cordial to drink – they were all running around like loonies. It is
the wind – whenever it is windy or raining, the children all seem to
go wild – it is just amazing. The first day it happened I commented
on the noise levels in the playground and the ladies I work with said
that it is always like that when it is windy or raining.

Take care everyone and have a great week !

TFTD : Friendship doubles our joy and divides our grief.

TIAGF : My health

Thank You !

A big thank you to everyone for your welcome back comments and e-mails
- I have to be honest and say that I didn't think that anyone would
have missed me so I was very touched to see that I was missed.

Well last night was not quite the night that I had planned. I didn't
get to walk but I did manage to go shopping so that I have lots of
point friendly snacks to bring with me to work. I thought that was
more important as the snack machine and Coles over the road have been
supplying my mid-morning or mid-afternoon snacks and I knew that I had
to stop those if I was to have any hope of losing these dreaded kilos
I have put on. Plus, I have to say that the weather was just
atrocious last night with dreadful winds blowing. Now I know that I
wouldn't have got blown away (not with these extra kilos I am carrying
anyway) but having been awake since 2am wondering if our roof was
going to blow off due to the renovations we are in the middle of doing
I felt I had every right to flop onto the bean bag after dinner and
wait for work time to come around.

While at work last night I was thinking about Oprah and her yo-yo
dieting and it got me to wonder how I would do if I had a personal
chef and a personal trainer working with me – every day and every
meal. Would I still do the secret eating thing if I knew that someone
was preparing me point friendly meals and snacks each day ? I do know
that if I had a PT kicking my butt and encouraging me along the way I
would be more inclined to exercise because I am, at heart, a lazy
person who would really prefer to sit and read a book than go out and
exercise.

I have my pilates class tonight but if I get home from work in time I
am going to walk / jog there so that will be a bit of exercise for the
day. Then I really need to get my act together to have something to
do most days after work. I guess part of me doesn't really want to
get into any exercise regime as such because I know that in a couple
of weeks time it is all going to go to pot when Al is in hospital and
I am trying to see him, work, get K organised for school as well as
getting her up to Brisbane to see her Dad. Actually, I think that is
also part of why I have let things slide as far as they have – no
excuse, I know, but a fact none the less. I felt as though I would be
wasting my time trying to get back on track and worry about what I am
putting in my mouth when I knew that for the first couple of weeks
after his operation, it is just going to be really difficult for me to
hold it all together. I think that this week I have realised that,
while it may turn to sh*t in a few weeks time, that doesn't stop me
from doing what I can between now and then to try to minimise any
additional gains.

It is really strange but all the weight I have put in on is all
between my waist and my thighs – I wish it would spread itself out a
little bit more evenly over the rest of my body.

TFTD : A friend is one who walks in when others walk out

TIAGF : Our roof not blowing off the house

Because Enough is Enough

Forgive me fellow dieters for I have been a naughty girl - it has been far too long since I last posted, tracked, exercised or went to WW.

But, as the drink driving ad says "Because enough is enough" and I have to do something about turning this horrible upward trend around. I have had to go up two pants sizes and I just cannot continue in this vein. My 500g packet of liquorice and a packet of biscuits every second day are not conducive to any sort of maintenance programme ! I hate what I am doing to myself but I have not been able to do anything about it - whether it was because I didn't want to or I couldn't or I just didn't like myself enough to want to have to bother, I don't know - but what I do know is that it has to stop - right here and right now. That is not to say that I won't have cr*ppy days. I'm sure that I will have those along the way, just as I am sure that there will be days when I feel like I can take on the world and other days when I feel that the whole world has it in for me BUT I do want to change this around and I commit to doing the best that I can.

It has been far to long between walks - my chiro spoke sternly to me of the need for me to be walking. I don't think I have walked since I did the City 2 Surf. I am trying not to make a whole range of changes at once as I don't want to be over-whelmed by what I have to do and, as there are quite a few other things happening in my life at the moment, I don't want to make the challenge too hard so that I feel a failure when I don't make it.

I do feel like I need to be accountable to someone which is why I am going to start blogging again. I have found out how to blog via e-mail which will make it easier for me to post but it doesn't help me in terms of reading other blogs. I do try to read some on the weekend but our computer is really not playing the game and so I land up being very frustrated at the end of an hour on the computer hence I don't read as many or as often as I would like. I know that I am a lot more careful about what I do and what I eat when I know that I am going to come on here and confess to my wrong-doings !!!!! I have realised that just stopping the junk food isn't enough, I have to start counting points and getting that exercise happening. I may take it one step at a time - get the exercise happening and then re-introduce the point counting at a later stage. As you may recall, Al has to have a rather big operation on his leg - that is happening in a couple of weeks time so I don't want to set myself goals which I know I won't be able to keep in a few weeks time - for a few weeks duration. So if I can start with the walking, I will be happy.

A friend has offered to walk with me a few afternoons after work so as soon as her husband goes back to work, I will see what I can do to meet up with her. I know that if I have to meet someone to walk with, I am more inclined to go walking than if it is just by myself and for no reason other than I need to exercise. I like to have a purpose to my exercise and, unfortunately, getting fit and losing weight isn't really enough of a purpose to motivate me.

Take care and have a great week everyone !!

TFTD : A friend can tell you thing you don't want to tell yourself.

TIAGF : My friends who have cared about me enough to keep in contact while I have been out of contact - thank you all - your support is truly appreciated.

This just might work

After a frustrating amount of time, I think I might have got this working so that it will post to my blog when I send the e-mail.

 

This may be what I need to get back on track and get my butt moving again.

 

Have a great weekend everyone !

Testing

Just testing to see if I can post here via e-mail.