Thursday, April 13, 2006

Which way is up ?????

I know that I said the other day that I was going to turn this downward slide into an upward movement but that hasn’t happened ………… yet. It has become too easy to not worry about bringing in lunch and just buying something from around the corner. The worst part is that I don’t even have to make my lunch because Al does lunches !!!! I think I have got bored with a Fray Bentos sandwich each day and would rather have a toasted sandwich from the bakery.

The past few days I have woken up and thought to myself “Today is the day I get back on track. Take control of what I am eating. Lose the extra few kilos that I want to lose” but somehow by morning tea time that has all gone to pot. Yesterday started off badly – I woke up late (having worked at extra shift this week at Coles) and didn’t have time for breakfast because I take the old lady from across the road into Southport on a Wednesday morning and I was going to be late for her. So, got to work and popped into the good old bakery around the corner for an apple muffin – what a pity they aren’t open on a Saturday (and the fact that they are a little bit further than the local Muffin Break) because I would love to have their apple muffin for our weekly muffin treat. From there, things just went from bad to worse. At lunch time I had to pop into Coles to get some Easter eggs for the Sunday. This is the first year that I have actually bought myself a chocolate Easter bunny – I am really looking forward to eating it. At this point I have to say that I think Easter eggs / bunnies / etc are a total rip off – the price you pay for a tiny amount of chocolate and a large amount of air is just ridiculous. I went home with 1 bunny each, a couple of hollow eggs and a small packet of solid eggs. There is something magical about breaking off pieces of a bunny and eating it that is just so different to breaking off a square of chocolate and eating it – well for me there is but then it doesn’t take much to send me off with the fairies !!!!! So I will looking forward to my bunny on Sunday – I have no doubt that it will not last past Sunday night.

When I went to the shops to get the Easter eggs I also found that 2 Chomp’s and a packet of Cinnamon Crunch biscuits had jumped into my basket before I got to the check-out. Well I didn’t have time to take them back so I just paid for them and took them to the office with me – actually, the Chomp’s didn’t make it to the office as they were both eaten before I even got there. But the Cinnamon Crunch did make it to the office and they kept me company during the afternoon – I was happily gazing out the window (yes, I know I was supposed to be working) and chomping on my biscuits. They were delicious and each one was a little more moreish than the previous one until ¾’s of the packet was gone and I had a bit of a reality check about how much I had actually eaten. Not good !!!

Popped in at home before going off to the hairdresser for my fort-nightly trim and then got home to find that I had nothing planned for dinner (again !!!) So, after consuming a box of Cheese Straws between the three of us we grabbed some box dinners (shocking I know but hey, you get that sometimes) out the freezer and had those before jumping into the shower and dashing off to work. This extra shift this week has really messed with my (working) routine – if only I could get the rest of my life’s routine worked out !!!!

Tomorrow we are planning another bush walk – not sure where or for how long as yet, but we will definitely be out there getting some exercise and trying out our new purchases from the weekend.

We have a couple of things to do on the weekend – around the house and out and about. I am hoping to be able to catch up on some reading as well. Plus we are working on Saturday night – taking down all the Easter eggs so we won’t be tempted when we walk into the store anymore !!!

The strange thing is that my weight has been pretty constant the past few weeks. I say “the strange thing” because my eating really hasn’t been anything like it should be and neither has my exercise. While I did get a “To Do “ list together, it was for the list of chores that needed to be done and places we needed to go to – it had nothing to do with planning my food / meals or organizing myself so that I can be better prepared to get back on track.

My clothes are still fitting me fine and on some days, my rings seem to be too big for me. I have now got my scales back and while I think I am showing a small gain (I can’t remember the last weight that I posted) – I am trying not to let the numbers dictate how my day is going to be and so long as clothes are still comfortable, I will not worry about the number.

I know that I should be saying “From my next meal I will watch what I am doing” but having just eaten 2 hot x buns and 4 little solid easter eggs at our work morning tea, and, having brought no lunch today I will have to go and buy something from somewhere to keep me going for the rest of the day. I have decided that, while I am not expecting to go mad over the long weekend, I will try to be aware of what I am putting into my mouth. I need to take a long hard look at what is stopping me from getting back on track and the reasons why I haven’t committed to losing the extra couple of kilos that I want to lose. I need to find the motivation to take back the control which I shouldn’t have given away (to nobody in particular) in the first place. I need to stop talking about what I want to do and just get on and do it !!!

I hope that you all have a very Happy and Blessed Easter – travel safely, take care and most importantly, let your hair down and have some fun this holiday season.

TFTD : Never let yesterday take up too much of today.

TIAGF : The opportunity to improve myself

6 Comments:

Blogger M said...

It is a strange and bizarre thing that when we get so close to the goal we want that we seem to do everything in our power not to get there. Is it because we are afraid that once we get there it is going to be too hard to stay, or is it more than that. The thought that if we are still losing that we will keep the focus on and that if we get to goal we will lose that focus and we are too scared to go there.

Either way I think that you are still doing things alright. You are doing more outdoors type exercise and you are involving your family more. That is fantastic. And so healthy.

So you have a great Easter break. Enjoy your family. Enjoy the time away from work and when Tuesday comes you can sit down and do the plan for food and exercise again and on it goes.

Looking forward to hearing about where you ended up walking tomorrow :D xx

8:44 PM  
Blogger Sandilee said...

Sometimes I think that our weight loss journey's are not only about food and exercise, but mentally and emotionally. I know for a long time that I concentrated on that side of things and even though the kilo's where not coming off I still felt that I was still going in the right direction.

Wishing you and your family a very safe and happy easter holiday season.

8:47 AM  
Blogger Leighanne said...

I was where you are now a few weeks ago - it is so hard to get back on track and even harder to stay there!!
Hope you and your family have a great Easter:)
As M said sit down and work it all out on Tuesday:)

9:26 AM  
Blogger Mary said...

Whoops, I've been buying a bit of lunch too and it's so god damn hard to keep saying "no butter" and "what's in that, has it got...". I'm going back to bringing my own next week but I have to remember to plan so I have everything I need.

LOL about the breaking off the bunny, I totally understand ;-)

I've been a bit lazy too and realised that I was getting complacent but I reckon it'll catch up on us you know. I am trying to kick the habit before I put the 20kg back on, scary thought.

I hope you enjoy your Easter matey and I'll catch you after that :-)

6:17 PM  
Blogger Briony said...

Its all about planning, we know that and yet we still don't do it. I need a kick up the bum too, here's yours (kick) now you owe me one. Hope you're having a nice break and not eating too much chocolate!
Bri

12:18 PM  
Blogger Kt said...

Hello! sorry to hear you are in a bit of a food funk at the moment, but u will get out of it, it might sound strange but just keep trying & you will get there. You've done so well with your weight loss & you are maintaining fabulously, its only natural to have a few struggles here & there.
Hope u enjoyed the bush walk & that chocolate bunny, i totally agree, there is nothing like the chocolate from a bunny! happy easter :)

11:17 AM  

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