Control

“C” was the letter that M gave me and while I haven’t been able to sit down and actually come up with 10 words to describe me, my word today is CONTROL ! And not even with a capital C – the whole word is in capitals because that is what I had yesterday. I took back the control that food has over me and put myself in control of what was going into my mouth. I took it one meal at a time and I DID IT !

I didn’t manage to get in any exercise but for me, exercising the restraint over what I put in my mouth was good enough (for day 1 anyway !) I got home from work this morning and had a WW fruit bar and a bite of something that Al was eating – purely because I didn’t want to eat a whole one myself but the taste was good enough for me. I went to sleep feeling so pleased with myself – I was happy, I was back in control and I knew that I could wake up this morning and love myself for the choices I made yesterday. I didn’t wake up hating myself because I blew another day – mind you, I didn’t look at myself in the mirror either because I am not that happy with myself yet, but I will get there. The scales showed me a lovely figure this morning and I am using that to keep me motivated today.

I have brought in my clothes to go walking at lunch time – this is something that I have often thought about doing but have never actually done anything about. There is one lady who mentioned us walking together at lunch time and I said that was a great idea but we just haven’t been able to co-ordinate taking lunch together and not having errands to run at lunch time. Last night at work I wondered why I felt I couldn’t walk by myself – no reason except that I hadn’t thought of it, so I packed a bag when I got home this morning to make sure that there was no excuses like “I didn’t have time”, “I forgot” etc and it is sitting here, behind my chair waiting for me to take it out at lunch time and get walking. Plus I have pilates tonight so that will be a little more exercise for the day – dinner is left overs so that will be an easy one before I shower and snuggle up on the bean bag to watch CSI.

I have some special dates coming up in the next couple of months and I really would like to be back down to where I was a few months ago (weightwise) – I know that I can do this and I need to stay focused on what I want to achieve.

Have a great day everyone and take care – thanks again to you all for your support – I know that this is what this forum is about but it is always so good to hear that I am not alone in this – there are others who have been through the same and completely understand what I am going through.

TFTD : Our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

TIAGF : Taking back control of what I put in my mouth